Here We Go Again

I stumbled upon this on PJW’s Channel:

I’ll give you a summary:

She’s considering divorcing her husband, who she’s known for 20 years, because he doesn’t do his fair share of household chores, like taking the trash out. She has to tell him. If he forgets, she badgers him. For instance, one day he forgot and she got on him about it. He said he’d be late for work (Earlier in the piece we find out that he takes the kids to daycare). So she had to do it, and was late for work.

Late for work? She says on her profiles she’s an ‘influencer’. Hmm.

More than likely she’s a low level admin assistant that fancies herself an influencer.

Whatever.

I can say, with some authority, that it doesn’t matter that he doesn’t do these things. He could take the trash out 100% of the time, do the lion’s share of cooking, cleaning, and dealing with the kids and it wouldn’t matter.

Because it’s about her, you see. All about her.

What’s even funnier, or sadder, is the yentas in the comments, like crabs in a barrel – You go gurl! Ditch him! He’s Worthless! pulling her towards misery.

Yeah.

Seems the dude is a utility lineman of sorts and probably makes decent coin. She has no idea the world he lives in as he works his nuts off putting a roof over their heads and food in their bellies.

Dewayne from Dry Creek Wrangler School put it best on a Chris Williamson interview:

You ought to watch that whole episode. At one point he’s asked what women should know about men. I’ll sum it up (starts at 1:26:06):

There’s 10,000 times more going on inside the head of a man that you have any idea. He’s carrying burdens you don’t have a clue about.

And he don’t know how to express it, don’t know what to do about it. And he figures if he puts it out there, communicates it, he’ll be shot down, called a fool, called weak. So he carries it inside. And you have no clue the hell and the burdens most men are carrying inside, and he’s not even showing you. – DeWayne Noel

But he’s not taking out the trash automatically, so off he goes.

You know, for every video like this I see, where a woman is complaining, I probably see ten where it’s two years out from blowing up her marriage and she’s bubbling about how hard it is and she made a mistake. She cuts him loose, and in most states I can bet she’ll be out of that nice house and taking the trash out herself – all the time, and moaning about how fast she was replaced.

The world’s gone nuts.

Being with a woman that wasn’t born in the US, and is from a more traditional, patriarchal culture really opened my eyes. She communicates. These women know that guys aren’t paying attention, so they have no problem asking you to do something. The don’t give clues, they don’t get mad if you don’t do it next time without asking. They tell you what they want. They tell you when they are happy with you. They are very clear when they aren’t happy with you. If they ask you to do something in a day or two, they remind you the night before, and text you the morning of. They don’t wait until we forget and bitch about it. They understand that the man may be the head of the family, but their the neck.

It’s refreshing. I can think of more than a few women that need to learn this skill.