A Dark Day

Dogs

Although it was sunny out today, it may as well be midnight to me, dark as my mood is.

I had to put Jethro down this morning.

It was a gut wrenching decision that has me overcome with grief and guilt.

The Vet gave me the first “talk” Saturday. He said he’s seen this before, and Jet should have come around by now, as hard a he was hitting him with steroids. He believed that Jet’s intestines were probably too scarred to recover. But, we’d see how he did over the weekend and regroup on Monday. This had been going on for over a month. We were at the point where I had to bring him for injections, since he wouldn’t/couldn’t take a pill.

Jethro had a few bites of food Saturday evening and Sunday morning. Sunday evening he ate a good part of a can of dog food. Maybe 2/3 cup. Today, he took a few bites and turned away.

Today was the second talk. It became apparent that we were only medicating him so he’d be alert as he starved to death. He’d lost over 15 lbs so far and was a bag of bones. He was starting to have trouble walking. It broke my already broken heart even more to do this.

He died with me at his side, stroking his head.

It’s taken most of the day for me to stop crying and become numb.

Aria is really off today. It’s as if she knows. Each morning after Jethro came back after his shots, she bombarded him with attention. We’ll get over him in time. We’re all each other has now, really.

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5 thoughts on “A Dark Day”

  1. Ohhh Mannn… A very tough day.. it will be the memories that bring comfort and a smile when the time is right.

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  2. I have a lot of empathy for you. I went through the same thing with my Patches in March. The good times will be remembered more than the bad days as time goes by but just reading about your loss is painful.

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  3. I am sorry for your loss. I’ve had to put three of them down. It never gets easier.

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  4. I’ve been following, praying and hoping for a better outcome for you and Jethro. Know that I am in complete sympathy and am hurting along with you. It’s like that for me… whenever anyone loses one of their Doggos.. I can’t help but recall all my pups over time that have passed along the years.

    The memories become bittersweet over time.

    If you’ve never read “Rescuing Sprite” by Mark Levin, it’s a wonderful tale and exemplary of what all of us dog lovers go through.

    Sincerly sorry for your loss. May you find solace in Aria and hold her a little closer. You both need a little extra from each other about now.

    Peace…

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  5. OK Now I’m fully in your Camp… Lost my Duke this morning. Completely unexpected and sudden. He went from being his usual, playful bundle of energy to beyond help in a moment.

    Undiagnosed, undetected, asymptomatic tumor on either his liver or spleen ruptured and he bled out internally.

    I’ve had this happen before. I don’t know what’s worse. Watching them suffer through a long illness… or having them suddenly ripped from your life.

    This… sucks…. immensely.

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